Well, the last post of the year may be the hardest. This morning Shadow refused to eat again and seemed to struggle getting around the house. The vet visited mid-morning. He believes she has cancer. We can either put her through a series of painful tests that, while identifying the problem, will probably not provide a path to a cure, or we can keep her comfortable until she’s in pain. Then we’ll make the call to let her move on.
I’m slightly buzzed now. Allow me to write my dog’s eulogy.
I first met Shadow in my second year, I think it was my second year, as a teacher at St. Ailbe’s School in Chicago. She, a collarless stray, wandered onto the playground one December day because, I assume, three hundred kids seemed like fun. As winter had arrived and she had no place to stay Shadow slept in the school boiler room for the first three nights I knew her. By the way, slight sidebar, Sister Kathryn, you fucking rock for letting us keep a dog in the school’s basement for three days. After talking it through with M we decided to take Shadow home. She promptly barfed all over my Lesabre, fought with the cats, and conned her way out of her bed in the bathroom and into ours within a week. What do I remember the most about our first year with Shadow? I remember the way she tilted her head the first time she heard voices (Billie Holiday) come out of a stereo speaker. I remember M, frustrated with her first teaching job, standing in the backyard, smoking, while Shadow played nearby. I remember Shadow leaping over the fence to play with the neighbor’s dog. What the hell were we thinking? That was dangerous. I remember walking with her around Chicago and thinking of how small she looked on the city streets.
For the last eleven years, most of Shadow’s life, she’s lived in a small Wisconsin town. My memories of Shadow revolve around home. I loved the way Shadow would put her paws on the windowsill and watch the street. I’ve sat on the back steps with her probably 500 nights, watching the stars, listening to the bats circle above us. I’ve walked hundreds of miles with her down the bike paths and woods. Shadow was a beautiful dog who rarely needed a leash and rarely, if ever, bit anyone. She was wonderful with my sons. My oldest son’s first word was, in fact, “Adow”. I believe she taught them about love, trust, and the souls of animals. I owe her forever for her role in the raising of my sons.
In close to fifteen years I slept away from Shadow maybe thirty nights, and ten of those were in Italy last year. She always slept next to me, whether I was on the front porch, the couch, or in my bed. She charmed the neighbors and chased the rabbits. She stole liberally from tables and licked my tears away. She has the best heart, the most trusting, innocent heart, I have ever seen. She taught me about goodness through a decade and a half when that lesson was more important than anything. In some ways we became adults together; I grew into a teacher and raised my children with Shadow at my side. I love her, and I will miss her for the rest of my life. Perhaps I’m just trying to make myself feel better, but I believe in the afterlife, I believe in souls all around us, and I hope and pray that I will feel her presence and she will feel mine. It’s not fair that we’re not dying at the same moment.
I won’t let you feel any pain, Shadow. The vet said you weren’t in pain. When you are, when it hurts and there’s nothing we can do, I’ll hold you as you pass on to the next world. You’re my girl. I owe you that. Thank you for everything.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
I’m on the couch, a little after eight, looking down at Shadow. I’m worried one of these nights I’ll go to sleep and wake to find her dead. Perhaps that’s the best way for her to go. She’s fading quickly, I fear, after a few weeks of shoulder problems and a quickly disappearing appetite. I keep looking for a reason, something I can do, but I’m not sure if one exists. You know that phrase, “keep her comfortable”? That’s what I’m trying to do tonight. This morning Shadow ate a little bit of egg, but not much, and she’s hardly moved from the futon since. She never ate a lot anyway but it’s strange that she doesn’t want to move at all. My poor little girl. I love her.
M and the boys are in Florida. Yesterday I drove them down to the airport. We arrived early and completed our pre-flight rituals with time to spare. The boys and I checked out the small airport museum while M checked the bags. Then we snagged pizza and let pennies spin down the circle-spinning thing near the bookstore. I stood near the security entrance and watched until my family was out of sight. I miss them already.
Since I was in the city I decided to consolidate commutes and made a few stops on the way home. First, after a frustrating parking search, I found a spot on third and snuck into Downtown Books. Goddamn, that building is amazing. I’m not sure how many floors it contains (four?) but books are crammed twelve feet high across every imaginable space, and these are large rooms, like narrow warehouse spaces. I ran into my neighbor Jim, a structural engineer, and he said I should get out as soon as possible because the building could fall at any minute. He might have a point. I cruised the stacks quickly, but despite the presence of hundreds of thousands of books I couldn’t find anything worthwhile I didn’t already have. The selection was interesting, to say the least. Most of the cheaper paperbacks were dead novels and forgotten genre fiction. I stumbled on a couple funny sections, e.g. an entire shelf devoted to the same remaindered “Lord of the Rings” edition and a box of Toni Morrison novels which someone appeared to (wisely) abandon at the foot of the “M” shelf. I need to take my friends to see this place.
I hit Whole Foods next, where I picked up more quinoa and Indian simmer sauce. Then I stopped at Borders, uselessly, and finished errands with a reserve shelf pickup at the library. What did I do next? I don’t remember. I drove home, worked out, showered, ate dinner, and read a while (Architecture of Happiness). A quick beer and some Beethoven later and I was asleep.
Shadow and I rose early. I worked out to a creepy history channel program on the nature of lust. After a shower and breakfast I hit Kohls with a “return credit” card for a new coat, massively cheap pajama pants (five bucks!) and two pair of special athletic underwear, one of which is orange and of a highly questionable sense of fashion. I also stopped at the Grafton post office, where most of both mailing packages and buying stamps is automated. I'm nerdily excited by 24 hour access to the post office. I stopped at the library again for a movie (Smart People) before returning home. After lunch I cleaned the kitchen cabinets, disposing of ancient prescription medicine and moving some food and dishes into basement storage. The kitchen looks great. Later I braved the grey, lightless afternoon for a new drill at Home Depot (necessary) and three films at Blockbuster (not necessary, but helpful since I’m staying inside the next few days). I watched “The Footfist Way” after a bath. The film was smart and funny, just what I needed. I followed the movie with another “Architecture of Happiness” session. Now I’m half-writing and half-wondering if Shadow has to pee. Snow is falling.
More tomorrow. I’m locking the doors and staying inside. Good night. I miss my family.
M and the boys are in Florida. Yesterday I drove them down to the airport. We arrived early and completed our pre-flight rituals with time to spare. The boys and I checked out the small airport museum while M checked the bags. Then we snagged pizza and let pennies spin down the circle-spinning thing near the bookstore. I stood near the security entrance and watched until my family was out of sight. I miss them already.
Since I was in the city I decided to consolidate commutes and made a few stops on the way home. First, after a frustrating parking search, I found a spot on third and snuck into Downtown Books. Goddamn, that building is amazing. I’m not sure how many floors it contains (four?) but books are crammed twelve feet high across every imaginable space, and these are large rooms, like narrow warehouse spaces. I ran into my neighbor Jim, a structural engineer, and he said I should get out as soon as possible because the building could fall at any minute. He might have a point. I cruised the stacks quickly, but despite the presence of hundreds of thousands of books I couldn’t find anything worthwhile I didn’t already have. The selection was interesting, to say the least. Most of the cheaper paperbacks were dead novels and forgotten genre fiction. I stumbled on a couple funny sections, e.g. an entire shelf devoted to the same remaindered “Lord of the Rings” edition and a box of Toni Morrison novels which someone appeared to (wisely) abandon at the foot of the “M” shelf. I need to take my friends to see this place.
I hit Whole Foods next, where I picked up more quinoa and Indian simmer sauce. Then I stopped at Borders, uselessly, and finished errands with a reserve shelf pickup at the library. What did I do next? I don’t remember. I drove home, worked out, showered, ate dinner, and read a while (Architecture of Happiness). A quick beer and some Beethoven later and I was asleep.
Shadow and I rose early. I worked out to a creepy history channel program on the nature of lust. After a shower and breakfast I hit Kohls with a “return credit” card for a new coat, massively cheap pajama pants (five bucks!) and two pair of special athletic underwear, one of which is orange and of a highly questionable sense of fashion. I also stopped at the Grafton post office, where most of both mailing packages and buying stamps is automated. I'm nerdily excited by 24 hour access to the post office. I stopped at the library again for a movie (Smart People) before returning home. After lunch I cleaned the kitchen cabinets, disposing of ancient prescription medicine and moving some food and dishes into basement storage. The kitchen looks great. Later I braved the grey, lightless afternoon for a new drill at Home Depot (necessary) and three films at Blockbuster (not necessary, but helpful since I’m staying inside the next few days). I watched “The Footfist Way” after a bath. The film was smart and funny, just what I needed. I followed the movie with another “Architecture of Happiness” session. Now I’m half-writing and half-wondering if Shadow has to pee. Snow is falling.
More tomorrow. I’m locking the doors and staying inside. Good night. I miss my family.
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Merry Christmas morning! I’m up way too early. I’ve been up since 1:30AM or so, thank you, excitable small children, and I’m quickly approaching the sleep/waking point of no return. Odds are I’m staying up. What the hell. I’ll sleep later. Thank God we never do that “drive to this family then that family then this family” thing on Christmas Day. I’m parking my ass on the couch and watching some basketball.
Yesterday was a pretty good day, except for the incident in which a snowplow almost creamed N in the alley. Let us not talk about that incident. Anyway, the snow was light and beautiful, and the air warmer, so we played outside in the morning. M and her mom went out for lunch/shopping near noon. We’ve all been stuck in the house between the bad roads and subzero temps, so any respite is welcome. Once they returned I hit the office to water the plants, clear out my email, and play loud music. The space was clean and welcoming. I love my office. Afterward I swung by Borders and then Schwartz’s, where I picked up a copy of “I Have The Right To Destroy Myself” before flowing down PW road to church. Now, I haven’t attended church in a good two months, and we haven’t given them money for a good six, so I could feel a few eyes on me as I entered the sanctuary. Remember, I used to be on the board. I sat in back near M’s mom and chatted until my ADD kicked into gear and I walked around the lobby and peered in the windows during the program. The boys did a great job. After the program everyone retired to the basement/church hall for a cast party, if you will. I hung out for thirty minutes and talked with the lady who plays violin for the MSO. She’s very nice. Then I gathered up the kids and drove home. M and her mom stayed to clean up. The boys and I fired up the stove, cooked the pizza, and watched tv. M and her mom followed not long after but M had to return to church because she forgot her camera. I think Christmas stress is getting to her. I hid upstairs and read my new book until I fell asleep, probably before eight.
We’re ready for a good Christmas. Good morning, everyone.
Yesterday was a pretty good day, except for the incident in which a snowplow almost creamed N in the alley. Let us not talk about that incident. Anyway, the snow was light and beautiful, and the air warmer, so we played outside in the morning. M and her mom went out for lunch/shopping near noon. We’ve all been stuck in the house between the bad roads and subzero temps, so any respite is welcome. Once they returned I hit the office to water the plants, clear out my email, and play loud music. The space was clean and welcoming. I love my office. Afterward I swung by Borders and then Schwartz’s, where I picked up a copy of “I Have The Right To Destroy Myself” before flowing down PW road to church. Now, I haven’t attended church in a good two months, and we haven’t given them money for a good six, so I could feel a few eyes on me as I entered the sanctuary. Remember, I used to be on the board. I sat in back near M’s mom and chatted until my ADD kicked into gear and I walked around the lobby and peered in the windows during the program. The boys did a great job. After the program everyone retired to the basement/church hall for a cast party, if you will. I hung out for thirty minutes and talked with the lady who plays violin for the MSO. She’s very nice. Then I gathered up the kids and drove home. M and her mom stayed to clean up. The boys and I fired up the stove, cooked the pizza, and watched tv. M and her mom followed not long after but M had to return to church because she forgot her camera. I think Christmas stress is getting to her. I hid upstairs and read my new book until I fell asleep, probably before eight.
We’re ready for a good Christmas. Good morning, everyone.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Man, I have not been in the mood to write in the journal lately. I’m not sure why. I think I spent so much time writing and reading with the end of the semester that the last thing I wanted to do was apply a sustained thought to paper. I thought I had adjusted to the rigors of a semester but the first two weeks of December always wear me down.
Anyway, at the moment I’m in the local library’s quiet room. I not only have the quiet room to myself, I think only two or three other people are in the building. The roads fucking suck and I think most citizens decided against braving driving. I don’t blame them, but I needed to get out of the house. Over the last few days I’ve spent more time reading in the bedroom than anything. M’s mom is here, and the visit has been fine, but I don’t want to watch the Today show or whatever and I don’t want to be rude and change the channel on her. I have home court advantage, I can go upstairs and read. No problem. This morning I thought I’d drive to the office but my car spun out on the road to the highway so I turned around, picked up my laptop and Herodotus, and hit the library.
I’m in an ok place, emotionally, but I’m scared of wasting my time off. If the weather wasn’t oppressive I’d spend more time in the city. I’ve never been to Downtown Books, I want to check it out, and I could use a couple hours in the Art Museum. Tomorrow’s Christmas Eve. If the roads are better maybe I’ll get out of the house in the morning. We’ll see.
What else is going on? A publication on academic leadership accepted another of my articles. Yay. I finished that awful Tucker Max book and picked up the Herodotus again. Last night M and I hit an Italian restaurant down the highway (she has gps on her phone now, by the way, which helps you search for restaurants…interesting) then browsed in a bookstore before the subzero temps chased us home. The boys are great, as usual, but growing bored quickly. We’re less than forty-eight hours from opening the gifts than should keep them busy for a while. Everyone leaves on Monday for five days. I might check out the MSO on New Year’s Eve.
Am I scattered enough for you today? My apologies.
Anyway, at the moment I’m in the local library’s quiet room. I not only have the quiet room to myself, I think only two or three other people are in the building. The roads fucking suck and I think most citizens decided against braving driving. I don’t blame them, but I needed to get out of the house. Over the last few days I’ve spent more time reading in the bedroom than anything. M’s mom is here, and the visit has been fine, but I don’t want to watch the Today show or whatever and I don’t want to be rude and change the channel on her. I have home court advantage, I can go upstairs and read. No problem. This morning I thought I’d drive to the office but my car spun out on the road to the highway so I turned around, picked up my laptop and Herodotus, and hit the library.
I’m in an ok place, emotionally, but I’m scared of wasting my time off. If the weather wasn’t oppressive I’d spend more time in the city. I’ve never been to Downtown Books, I want to check it out, and I could use a couple hours in the Art Museum. Tomorrow’s Christmas Eve. If the roads are better maybe I’ll get out of the house in the morning. We’ll see.
What else is going on? A publication on academic leadership accepted another of my articles. Yay. I finished that awful Tucker Max book and picked up the Herodotus again. Last night M and I hit an Italian restaurant down the highway (she has gps on her phone now, by the way, which helps you search for restaurants…interesting) then browsed in a bookstore before the subzero temps chased us home. The boys are great, as usual, but growing bored quickly. We’re less than forty-eight hours from opening the gifts than should keep them busy for a while. Everyone leaves on Monday for five days. I might check out the MSO on New Year’s Eve.
Am I scattered enough for you today? My apologies.
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Friday, December 19, 2008
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Monday, December 15, 2008
Monday morning, a little after six, no one up yet. T especially needed the sleep. He attended the YMCA lock-in and reported he didn’t sleep at all. Yesterday he was all groggy, so I’m glad he’s sleeping late today. Shadow’s crashed on the futon. I woke near 1:30 but fell asleep again near two and managed to stay that way until after five. Yay me.
The weather channel website says wind gusts are pushing forty. The house creaks with their influence. The temperatures are barely above zero, too. Long day. I’m working at home this morning, finishing grades, paperwork, etc. Later I’ll pick up my new glasses, if they’re ready, and head into the office, where I’ll assist with the MAT benchmarks and probably not arrive home until 8:30. I miss the boys on nights when I don’t see them until after they’re in bed.
Yesterday I cleaned and reorganized my home office shelves, worked out to Gossip Girls, and probably ate too many cookies. I may pull back on working out. I’m pushing too hard and I can’t shake this cold. After noon I watched a bit of the Pack game before driving over to graduation. The ceremony was boring but at least fifteen minutes shorter than usual.
I’m not happy lately. I’m tight and self-protective. I’m not sure why.
6:19AM. Rare that everyone’s still asleep this late. I hope they’re warm.
The weather channel website says wind gusts are pushing forty. The house creaks with their influence. The temperatures are barely above zero, too. Long day. I’m working at home this morning, finishing grades, paperwork, etc. Later I’ll pick up my new glasses, if they’re ready, and head into the office, where I’ll assist with the MAT benchmarks and probably not arrive home until 8:30. I miss the boys on nights when I don’t see them until after they’re in bed.
Yesterday I cleaned and reorganized my home office shelves, worked out to Gossip Girls, and probably ate too many cookies. I may pull back on working out. I’m pushing too hard and I can’t shake this cold. After noon I watched a bit of the Pack game before driving over to graduation. The ceremony was boring but at least fifteen minutes shorter than usual.
I’m not happy lately. I’m tight and self-protective. I’m not sure why.
6:19AM. Rare that everyone’s still asleep this late. I hope they’re warm.
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Whoo. Never underestimate the intensity of the end of the semester. I’m exhausted. How do I summarize? I’ll skip the first few days of the week. Suffice to say I worked a lot. Wednesday in particular was productive. Oh, I should mention that M was off on Tuesday so she and I white-knuckled the shitty roads down to Bayshore, where M bought a shirt and we trolled the Trader Joe’s aisle for new things to eat. Ok. That’s it through Thursday.
Thursday morning I attended the boys’ school Christmas program. I don’t fit in very well among the other parents, I’m afraid, so I sat way on the side near where the kids enter (after a couple years I’ve learned where to sit), read Murakami, and waved at each of my boys as they entered the gym. The boys did a great job. I was proud. Afterwards I ran through the freezing cold to the car and drove to work. My neck hurt, and I was slightly under the weather, but I attended my 11:30AM meeting and managed to get some work done in the afternoon. By 3 or so, when the student teachers arrived, I felt seriously ill. After walking through each student’s portfolio I left the group to the new teacher panel and drove home. Pulling into the garage I couldn’t stop shaking. I willed myself inside, took a shower, huddled under the warmest sleeping bag, and shook myself to sleep. At 4AM N crawled into bed with me. I rose, went downstairs, canceled my only appointment for the day, and remained, exhausted, on the couch for most of the morning. I watched the surprisingly good “Don’t Mess With the Zohan” but couldn’t raise the energy to clean. After the boys arrived home I hung out for a while then snuck upstairs to read (Gaiman’s “Graveyard Boys”, from the reserve list, so I put down the Herodotus for the weekend) and listen to Stars of the Lid. I fell asleep by 7 and didn’t wake until 4:30. God, I needed that sleep. Today I felt much better but still weak. I cleaned a little (always a sign I’m feeling better) until my mom arrived at 9:30AM (thirty minutes early, par for the course). Luckily T had a game at 10:45AM, so I managed an hour long reprieve with the mp3 player and book on the bleachers. Afterwards we stopped by Best Buy for a new video game (Forgotten Realms?) and the first Gossip Girls season. After my mom left I worked out to the first episode. I’m still tired but I’m glad I worked out.
T’s got a friend over. They leave for a YMCA lock-in pretty soon. Everyone’s spazzing out in the house. I’m trying to get M to watch Gossip Girls. Quiet. I need quiet. More later.
Thursday morning I attended the boys’ school Christmas program. I don’t fit in very well among the other parents, I’m afraid, so I sat way on the side near where the kids enter (after a couple years I’ve learned where to sit), read Murakami, and waved at each of my boys as they entered the gym. The boys did a great job. I was proud. Afterwards I ran through the freezing cold to the car and drove to work. My neck hurt, and I was slightly under the weather, but I attended my 11:30AM meeting and managed to get some work done in the afternoon. By 3 or so, when the student teachers arrived, I felt seriously ill. After walking through each student’s portfolio I left the group to the new teacher panel and drove home. Pulling into the garage I couldn’t stop shaking. I willed myself inside, took a shower, huddled under the warmest sleeping bag, and shook myself to sleep. At 4AM N crawled into bed with me. I rose, went downstairs, canceled my only appointment for the day, and remained, exhausted, on the couch for most of the morning. I watched the surprisingly good “Don’t Mess With the Zohan” but couldn’t raise the energy to clean. After the boys arrived home I hung out for a while then snuck upstairs to read (Gaiman’s “Graveyard Boys”, from the reserve list, so I put down the Herodotus for the weekend) and listen to Stars of the Lid. I fell asleep by 7 and didn’t wake until 4:30. God, I needed that sleep. Today I felt much better but still weak. I cleaned a little (always a sign I’m feeling better) until my mom arrived at 9:30AM (thirty minutes early, par for the course). Luckily T had a game at 10:45AM, so I managed an hour long reprieve with the mp3 player and book on the bleachers. Afterwards we stopped by Best Buy for a new video game (Forgotten Realms?) and the first Gossip Girls season. After my mom left I worked out to the first episode. I’m still tired but I’m glad I worked out.
T’s got a friend over. They leave for a YMCA lock-in pretty soon. Everyone’s spazzing out in the house. I’m trying to get M to watch Gossip Girls. Quiet. I need quiet. More later.
Sunday, December 07, 2008
T and M are off at a birthday party (I think the party revolves around “Bolt”), while N watches The Justice League and S plays Pokemon on DS. After M returns home I might go upstairs and finish The Possibility of An Island. I already worked out an hour but I almost feel like working out again. What the hell, maybe I’ll watch the Cowboys/Steelers and knock out another half hour.
Last night I fell asleep on the futon in the living room. That worked out well, actually, as I slept like the dead and benefited from the humidifier about five feet from my head. This morning, after I woke, I worked out to High School Musical 2: The Pop-Up Edition with T and S. I felt bad because N wanted to play but S more or less ignores him, so I leaned on S to at least give him an answer. T and I hit Costco and Best Buy after a couple neighbor kids arrived to play with the younger kids. We had fun, cruising through the Costco aisles and checking out computer games at Best Buy. Now, I don’t know, I don’t run as a big of a risk of job loss as some people, I like to think, but I still remain careful of what I buy and the like, so we left Best Buy empty handed and picked up necessities (in my eyes, anyway) at Costco. T ran off to play computer after we unloaded the food. M watched the X-Files movie while I read a bit and cleaned. No more army men set-ups on the dining room table! It’s too hard to eat with the crap everywhere.
Last night’s seasonal depression was rough. When the winter sun fades the night sky feels as if it’s inches above my head. I did Tai Chi and tried to read. For the most part it worked.
I hope T is having fun at his party. He’s a great kid.
Tomorrow should be an interesting day at work. If I stay focused I may be able to stay home Tuesday and Wednesday. The forecasters are saying we could get heavy snow Tuesday, so staying home might be a decent option. We’ll see.
Last night I fell asleep on the futon in the living room. That worked out well, actually, as I slept like the dead and benefited from the humidifier about five feet from my head. This morning, after I woke, I worked out to High School Musical 2: The Pop-Up Edition with T and S. I felt bad because N wanted to play but S more or less ignores him, so I leaned on S to at least give him an answer. T and I hit Costco and Best Buy after a couple neighbor kids arrived to play with the younger kids. We had fun, cruising through the Costco aisles and checking out computer games at Best Buy. Now, I don’t know, I don’t run as a big of a risk of job loss as some people, I like to think, but I still remain careful of what I buy and the like, so we left Best Buy empty handed and picked up necessities (in my eyes, anyway) at Costco. T ran off to play computer after we unloaded the food. M watched the X-Files movie while I read a bit and cleaned. No more army men set-ups on the dining room table! It’s too hard to eat with the crap everywhere.
Last night’s seasonal depression was rough. When the winter sun fades the night sky feels as if it’s inches above my head. I did Tai Chi and tried to read. For the most part it worked.
I hope T is having fun at his party. He’s a great kid.
Tomorrow should be an interesting day at work. If I stay focused I may be able to stay home Tuesday and Wednesday. The forecasters are saying we could get heavy snow Tuesday, so staying home might be a decent option. We’ll see.
Saturday, December 06, 2008
I don’t care how many times I experience the end of the semester, the last couple weeks before graduation are always a bitch. This past Thursday and Friday were particularly awful. I won’t go into details.
So what about today? Today has been ok. I’ll start with last night. M and I watched 30 Rock and The Office while the boys played upstairs. I finally returned to The Possibility of An Island, after a rare couple of days away from books, and read for a solid hour before falling asleep on the couch. I stumbled upstairs near midnight and crashed in the guest bedroom. Later, towards dawn, I had a strange dream about riding with Shadow on Amtrak through Indiana. At one stop we got out to walk around and the train left without us. For some reason I called LM from work to pick us up. I saw her at a meeting yesterday. Maybe that’s why she was on my mind.
T was up and downstairs by five, probably in part due to the St. Nick’s celebration. Shadow and I joined him a little later, fired up some coffee, and checked email. T and his brothers, once they were up, let M sleep until 6:30AM before waking her and attacking their St. Nick’s gifts. Each kid got candy and army men. My kids are into sugar and violence. The boys played with their new set-ups for a good couple hours. I jumped in the car and hit the supermarket and donut shop. Our donut shop rocks. The building smells like a bakery although the booths and formica are more indicative of a fast food restaurant. An old woman got my donuts (only six) before I walked through the snow, drove past the snowplows, and returned home. I skipped working out Friday, the first day off in three weeks, so I climbed on the elliptical for an hour while watching “21” and some new Travel Channel show in which a guy takes on food challenges across the nation. He won this one, by the way, by eating some five pound steak in a half hour. Something like that. After a shower and breakfast T, S and I drove over to the hill for snowboarding. Goddamn, the wind and air were cold. I lasted about twenty minutes before hiding in the car. The boys joined me soon afterwards. We spent the rest of the afternoon watching “The Princess Bride” while M worked upstairs on her laptop. T is off singing at some crazyass outdoor choir concert. No thanks!
I’m tired, man. But I’m not sure what to do tonight. I think I’ll read now. Snowboarding pics later. Good night.
So what about today? Today has been ok. I’ll start with last night. M and I watched 30 Rock and The Office while the boys played upstairs. I finally returned to The Possibility of An Island, after a rare couple of days away from books, and read for a solid hour before falling asleep on the couch. I stumbled upstairs near midnight and crashed in the guest bedroom. Later, towards dawn, I had a strange dream about riding with Shadow on Amtrak through Indiana. At one stop we got out to walk around and the train left without us. For some reason I called LM from work to pick us up. I saw her at a meeting yesterday. Maybe that’s why she was on my mind.
T was up and downstairs by five, probably in part due to the St. Nick’s celebration. Shadow and I joined him a little later, fired up some coffee, and checked email. T and his brothers, once they were up, let M sleep until 6:30AM before waking her and attacking their St. Nick’s gifts. Each kid got candy and army men. My kids are into sugar and violence. The boys played with their new set-ups for a good couple hours. I jumped in the car and hit the supermarket and donut shop. Our donut shop rocks. The building smells like a bakery although the booths and formica are more indicative of a fast food restaurant. An old woman got my donuts (only six) before I walked through the snow, drove past the snowplows, and returned home. I skipped working out Friday, the first day off in three weeks, so I climbed on the elliptical for an hour while watching “21” and some new Travel Channel show in which a guy takes on food challenges across the nation. He won this one, by the way, by eating some five pound steak in a half hour. Something like that. After a shower and breakfast T, S and I drove over to the hill for snowboarding. Goddamn, the wind and air were cold. I lasted about twenty minutes before hiding in the car. The boys joined me soon afterwards. We spent the rest of the afternoon watching “The Princess Bride” while M worked upstairs on her laptop. T is off singing at some crazyass outdoor choir concert. No thanks!
I’m tired, man. But I’m not sure what to do tonight. I think I’ll read now. Snowboarding pics later. Good night.
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