So out of nowhere I finished a poem tonight:

Melatonin Gives Me Bad Dreams

After I take the pill
I taste chalk

And when I rest my
Heart buzzes
And snakes circle
My heart

And I’m covered in loose gauze
And I can’t move
Very well.

Melatonin gives me bad dreams;
Like when I
Stabbed a prostitute
With a cartoon cigarette
On the sidewalk by
A pharmacy.

And I wake to
Round stones
Like eggs
On my chest
And I pull myself
From a gravel bed

Discompose the white dust
Lick my lips
And push into the mist.



I’m not entirely happy with the ending but the poem needed release. So there it is.

M and the boys are still out east. I haven’t written since Thursday. What did I do? Friday I hit Chicago with friends. Saturday I didn’t work out for maybe the fifth time all summer but instead sat on the couch and watched baseball. Sunday…what did I do Sunday? I don’t remember. Yesterday I drove down to the office. The first few hours were fine, checking email and catching up with colleagues, but by noon I grew intolerably bored and drove over to half-priced books to browse. I considered some Delillo (Names) but decided against the purchase. I hung around for a boring meeting into which I got suckered (hiring a new instructional tech person) then drove home, worked out, and read the Aeneid (Fitzgerald translation) until I fell asleep. This morning I worked out again (Bourdain’s new Tokyo episode) and decided against driving into the office. Instead I half-worked on syllabi, ate, and screwed around on GR and the net in general. By noon I was fairly disgusted with myself so I talked with D and M on the phone then gathered up enough energy to check out Pineapple Express at the multiplex. The building was deserted. I gave my money to the ticket taking guy who then both ripped my ticket and hustled behind the concessions counter to sell me a soda. Now that’s multitasking. For a while I had the theatre to myself, a kickass prospect, but within a few minutes maybe five or six others arrived. I found the movie better than watchable but I’m starting to recognize Rogen’s voice behind his dialogue. Movie theatres spur my energy and creativity, so after working out again I ate a quick dinner, cleaned the house, and settled down to burn CDs and work on the above poem. So the day wasn’t a total waste. We’ll see about tomorrow.

I miss my family. I think I’ll sit on the backyard steps for a while before catching up with Virgil. Good night.