So the last couple days were rough. Yesterday (Monday) near 2AM I woke to find Cleo stuck on the stairs. I took her downstairs and watched television while she slept on my lap. When I put her on the ground she couldn’t walk. She and I hung out for a while but it was clear she didn’t have much time left and she was in pain. She peed on the floor, trying to get to the litter box, I think, so I called the emergency vet on the top of town. A huge, windy thunderstorm broke out, the perfect weather for catharsis. I wrapped my little girl up in my Stritch blanket and drove with her on my lap to the vet’s office. I ran through the storm to the lobby and told the clerk I wanted to put my cat to sleep. The clerk was quite nice. I filled out a few forms while the clerk fit Cleo with a catheter. He and the vet gave us a few minutes to say goodbye. I stoked her head, thanked her for being so good, and told her I’d see her on the other side. I will miss her. I remember the way she curled up behind the desk, next to the heating register, back in Chicago. I remember her sleeping in my laundry basket. I remember her catching mice and proudly displaying them on the living room floor. And mostly I remember the hours she spent sleeping on my lap. Go in peace, little girl. The vet came into the room and a brief shot later she was gone. I sat on the bench outside the office, before dawn, in the rain, and cried my eyes out. Two cats in two days. Goodbye, my friends. Goodbye.

I slept until ten when I returned home and couldn’t get moving all day. M and I talked, of course, and I think she was both sad and relieved. After a couple hours of doing nothing I watched “Street Fight” (a great documentary about a Newark, NJ mayoral race) and worked out. The clouds appeared spent so after Shadow and I walked our Netflix envelopes to the mailbox I drove down to Borders with a 40% coupon and picked up the new Murakami. The purchase felt decadent as the book is small, less than 200 pages, and still cost 12 bucks with the coupon. But I love Murakami and I’d end up buying the book sooner or later (how much cheaper could it be in paperback?). I also picked up the first season of Veronica Mars (Dan highly recommended the series) for fifteen bucks at Best Buy. When I returned home I curled up with the Murakami and fell asleep early.

This morning I worked out to Bourdain’s Southwest episode, talked with the boys on the phone (they’re having fun out east), and half-cleaned the kitchen. After meditation I’m hitting the second floor for cleaning. I’m ready. The Mountain Goats’ “Cotton” keeps running through my head. Have a good day. Carry on.