I don’t know if today could have been shittier. I’m not one to complain or sound like a country song but today sucked. One of my cats died. The other is going to die soon. My wife and kids left today for two weeks at her mom’s. The house is a fucking mess. A part fell off the elliptical we bought two weeks ago because something was on eh track when I started to work out. At least the elliptical still seems to work fine. The part seems like a wheel cover. The house is messy, the air hot and sticky, and I’m gritting my teeth. How do you get past this? Meditation? Tai Chi? I have no fucking clue. Plus Cleo just knocked over my diet coke.

Ok, at about 10, after playing some baseball in the back field with the boys, we left for the airport. M and I decided to wait to tell the boys about Mars. Hell, I think it’s a safe bet Cleo will pass on by the time they return. The ride to the airport was uneventful, at least, after I had to lean on S for fucking with his little brother right before we left. M checked in the boys while I parked the car. Ok, here’s a good thing about today. The Milwaukee airport rocks. I pull up, drop off my wife, drive to the parking garage, walk the ten feet to the door, enter the terminal, and there you go. No crowds. Yay Milwaukee. M caught up with us upstairs. The shoeshine guys fascinated N. I don’t think he ever noticed them before. We inspected the small airport museum, taking special care with the international money display. M wanted to check out the used bookstore so the boys and I settled in the lobby chairs near the television until takeoff. I waved to the kids as they passed through security (no line!) and headed north.

The first day after the boys leave is always the hardest. I stopped at work, watered a couple of plants, sent a few documents through interoffice mail, and dropped off a movie at Blockbuster. For a moment I thought of hitting Target and Costco but the post-church crowds may have sent me into homicidal territory. I drove home and watched the Sheets suck it up for the Brewers while I fucked around looking for curtains on the computer. Then I decided I could either sit around all day and get pissed off (I think this is how I deal with my sadness) or I could go out. Oh, I also wanted to eat everything in the house. Think food is stress relief? Heh. I didn’t, though, driving back to Coscto and Target instead and navigating the somewhat more manageable late afternoon Sunday crowds. When I returned home I worked out (stupidass elliptical now missing a part, which really isn’t a big deal, and I doubt I’d be pissed off about it any other day but today) to Weeds. I’m almost finished with season one. After a quick shower I started laundry and began pasta for dinner. Oh, I also called the vet a hundred times to see when he could pick up Mars’ body for cremation but he’s been out of town and I think his answering machine is full. Mars, in case you’re wondering (and I would if I were you) is in a big plastic tub in the basement. I miss you already, big guy. I’m waiting for you to come upstairs any second. Cleo misses you more, I think. She’s been meowing all day.

M called to let me know everyone arrived safely out east. I also cleaned some of the first floor and might continue after I finish writing. The act of getting this down leaves me feeling a bit better. I’m trying to breathe. More later. Good night.