I’m back on the Hultquist porch again. The women on Bestor Plaza are wearing their slightly better than normal, but not their best, summer gear, sort of like they’re planning on watching but not playing tennis. A fat preteen is selling “Chautauqua Daily” newspapers near the walkway by chanting, in the most atonal manner possible, of the paper’s properties.

Few young kids are in evidence. This week’s “club/children’s school” program started at nine. T and I rode down to his building this morning. He wanted to arrive early. I couldn’t tell if he was nervous or excited, although I suppose some combination of both would be reasonable. S and N rode the bus to their school. M tagged along.

Yesterday seemed to last forever. Sundays are long at Chautauqua. The kids have very little to do. Those are the days on which I’m reminded that our yard, back field, and neighbors are wonderful, not that I would ever really complain about my living situation. Actually, that’s a good segue…

Ok, this is my 100th post on this blog. By coincidence, this is all the ten year anniversary of our move to P.W. In honor of the dual anniversary, I’d like to point out ten things I’ve learned about living in a small town in Wisconsin over the last decade. Allow me to share a bit of background first. The town has about 12,000 residents, up from just under 10,000 a decade ago, and the growth rate is accelerating. Milwaukee is about twenty miles down US43, and the population is slowly changing from locals who have generation-spanning roots to relative newcomers like me.

1) If you have to wait behind more than two people in line at the grocery store, something is wrong.
2) People say “hi” to each other in the street a lot. This threw me, of course, when I first moved here, but now I get pissed off if someone doesn’t say “hi” after I say “hi.” Yes, I can see the hypocrisy.
3) The racism and conservative nature of most small towns is usually under the surface, but not so far under the surface that you can’t discern its presence. The lake is pretty clear as far as that is concerned.
4) If you’re white and comparatively clean, cut your grass, all that, you should be ok. People value the fact you don’t have to lock your doors, chain up your bike, etc. If you’re viewed as a threat to that condition, you’re in a shitload of trouble.
5) Don’t speed. NEVER speed. The police will pull you over in a heartbeat, and they hide well.
6) Everyone knew who you were about ten seconds after you moved into town. Approximately 75% of their information about you is slightly inaccurate. For example, they may know you moved to town from Chicago, but they also think you have a relative in Sheboygan or work at the bank, neither of which is true.
7) Not everybody buys into high school sports, but the football games are well attended.
8) The 3AM bar culture is another dimension. You’d think that people would learn not to piss on the walls after closing, but those people tend not to read the police blotter and don’t realize that someone gets busted for that every night of the week. Also, arresting wall pissers must be the least glamorous police duty in southeastern Wisconsin.
9) The local newspaper is very important. Read the newspaper, all of it, including the minutes of school and city board meetings, if you want to know what’s going on around you.
10) You don’t have to go out, but you don’t have to stay home. Friday nights in February can be hard, but the internet can get you all the books and movies you need. Just don’t expect to find an open coffee shop within twenty miles after 6PM.

That’s it for now. I’m off to rent a bike and ride off the grounds.