640 posts...time to start over. I can be found at:
http://randomanthonywrites.blogspot.com/
Thanks for everything.
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Saturday, May 28, 2011
Monday, April 25, 2011
I'm on the couch, 6:08PM, N and T watching 30 Rock, the dogs sleeping next to me on the futon. S is off at soccer, M on the other computer. Tomorrow's lunch is ready, my clothes laid out, and I don't need to do anything until tomorrow. That feels weird and somewhat tense. I also read my work email and the 360 degree comments, i.e. the comments from my colleagues about my performance, are supposedly in my mailbox. That makes me nervous. What am I supposed to learn from this? I'll breathe. I'll learn what I can. Practice.
Ok, last night I did the sprint workout. That forty minutes kicked my ass, but in a good way. Preston says I should be careful not to pull a muscle. I probably pushed too hard last night, but I survived, and I felt the workout effects for a good hour after I finished. That's good. My body has grown too accustomed to the gym workouts. T wanted to watch Jackass 3 later, after I took a shower, and at first I said I'd fall asleep and he could watch it alone, but he said he wanted to watch it together so he could laugh at the funny parts with someone. He's a good kid. I crashed on the futon and half-watched. That was fun, really. Then I slept on the futon with Pete while M slept on the chair.
More later, I keep getting interrupted. Breathe.
Ok, last night I did the sprint workout. That forty minutes kicked my ass, but in a good way. Preston says I should be careful not to pull a muscle. I probably pushed too hard last night, but I survived, and I felt the workout effects for a good hour after I finished. That's good. My body has grown too accustomed to the gym workouts. T wanted to watch Jackass 3 later, after I took a shower, and at first I said I'd fall asleep and he could watch it alone, but he said he wanted to watch it together so he could laugh at the funny parts with someone. He's a good kid. I crashed on the futon and half-watched. That was fun, really. Then I slept on the futon with Pete while M slept on the chair.
More later, I keep getting interrupted. Breathe.
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Happy Easter. I love Easter's message of hope and rebirth. Had I not been a slacker who doesn't like hymns I might have attended mass. Next week.
Today has been fine. Holidays are hard on M. She misses her family, wishes they were nearby, close enough so they could easily visit. M feels the holidays, especially minor holidays, are boring. We're usually together, all five of us, while the neighbors are off with relatives. I would say visiting relatives doesn't sound bad but I remember tense, endless afternoons at my grandparents' Northlake house. Without those visits I might not have become a voracious reader, but as I preferred avoiding ass-kickings I usually hid in dusty rooms or a clammy basement and read the hours away. So today, for example, when T and I were driving downtown and we saw a couple and a child gussied up in their Sunday best, headed to the Port Hotel restaurant, well, there but for the grace of God go I. And if the afternoon was boring, well, tense and endless is worse than boring.
We took the dogs to the beach early, around nine, and let them run leashless up and down the shore. Mack and Pete were 75% good except for a longass sprint back toward the power plant when they were supposed to stay close to us. Later I ate lunch, watched baseball, and discovered Redbox's awesome system through which one can find/order a movie online and pick said movie up at the appropriate Redbox. I also read a bit more in that book about fastballs and wrote a Tomato Red review draft. At seven I'm giving that sprint workout a shot. Have I mentioned the sprint workout?
http://sportsmedicine.about.com/od/sampleworkouts/a/30sec_sprints.htm
The gym workouts are getting routine. I'm hoping this jolt to the system will get my metabolism back in gear. Maybe the cemetery would make a good sprint path. More later. I couldn't lift today, by the way, my arms weren't up for the sets. That's fine. Listen to my body, I know.
I forgot to mention last night. First, I picked up T from a park in Saukville. He was hanging out with four or five very white trash kids who did not give exactly favorable first impressions. I drove four of them home, all but one new to me, and they were slightly more likable as the commute progressed. T's a good kid. He'll figure out with whom he should associate. I hope. Then M watched The King's Speech but the film bored me in about ten seconds so T and I headed west to Target for supplemental Easter supplies. Oh, I also helped M pack plastic eggs with foil-covered chocolate eggs and jellybeans that were really Starburst and, in turn, were edible. I was up later than usual, maybe 10:30, reading. Leaving bed this morning wasn't easy. Not sure why. The boys did a great job
with the egg search. I stayed out of the way.
Ok, maybe I'll clean, meditate, breathe, anything. The house is quiet. More tomorrow.
Today has been fine. Holidays are hard on M. She misses her family, wishes they were nearby, close enough so they could easily visit. M feels the holidays, especially minor holidays, are boring. We're usually together, all five of us, while the neighbors are off with relatives. I would say visiting relatives doesn't sound bad but I remember tense, endless afternoons at my grandparents' Northlake house. Without those visits I might not have become a voracious reader, but as I preferred avoiding ass-kickings I usually hid in dusty rooms or a clammy basement and read the hours away. So today, for example, when T and I were driving downtown and we saw a couple and a child gussied up in their Sunday best, headed to the Port Hotel restaurant, well, there but for the grace of God go I. And if the afternoon was boring, well, tense and endless is worse than boring.
We took the dogs to the beach early, around nine, and let them run leashless up and down the shore. Mack and Pete were 75% good except for a longass sprint back toward the power plant when they were supposed to stay close to us. Later I ate lunch, watched baseball, and discovered Redbox's awesome system through which one can find/order a movie online and pick said movie up at the appropriate Redbox. I also read a bit more in that book about fastballs and wrote a Tomato Red review draft. At seven I'm giving that sprint workout a shot. Have I mentioned the sprint workout?
http://sportsmedicine.about.com/od/sampleworkouts/a/30sec_sprints.htm
The gym workouts are getting routine. I'm hoping this jolt to the system will get my metabolism back in gear. Maybe the cemetery would make a good sprint path. More later. I couldn't lift today, by the way, my arms weren't up for the sets. That's fine. Listen to my body, I know.
I forgot to mention last night. First, I picked up T from a park in Saukville. He was hanging out with four or five very white trash kids who did not give exactly favorable first impressions. I drove four of them home, all but one new to me, and they were slightly more likable as the commute progressed. T's a good kid. He'll figure out with whom he should associate. I hope. Then M watched The King's Speech but the film bored me in about ten seconds so T and I headed west to Target for supplemental Easter supplies. Oh, I also helped M pack plastic eggs with foil-covered chocolate eggs and jellybeans that were really Starburst and, in turn, were edible. I was up later than usual, maybe 10:30, reading. Leaving bed this morning wasn't easy. Not sure why. The boys did a great job
with the egg search. I stayed out of the way.
Ok, maybe I'll clean, meditate, breathe, anything. The house is quiet. More tomorrow.
Saturday, April 23, 2011
I'm upstairs, leaning back in the green camping chair N set up next to the bookcase. The windows are open but the air is losing its heat. Kids and siren sounds filter through the screen. Birds, too.
Today is lost and directionless but not bad and probably necessary. After days or weekends like these I tend to manifest productivity. Isn't that why weekends exist? This morning, after restless sleep, I woke near 7, drank coffee, and took a shower. At nine I dragged everyone to the library. We parked on the street by the kids' section. T and I stayed upstairs while M, N, and S searched through the downstairs stacks. I found a couple baseball books, one on fastball pitchers and the other on statistics. The cable guy predicted a 10-12 window for phone repair, so N and I dropped off his mother and the two older boys before heading to Alterra's for a bagel, latte, and orange juice. The space was crowded but we snagged the table close near the counter and read for a solid half hour. I love those stretches. N will, hopefully, remember them.
The air was warm, well, warmer, around 50, and the water in the ground after a week's rain evaporated so I felt as if I were in a cooler and more comfortable version of Florida. I ate lunch, watched (with N) a documentary on the open oceans, and read the first forty pages of the fishing book. I'm restless. T needs a ride from Saukville in thirty minutes. Maybe I'll get him. The King's Speech sits in my backpack but I don't know that I'm in the mood. Tomorrow's Easter. I wouldn't mind hitting mass. Oh, I forgot to mention I worked out earlier, too, but I'm getting bored with the gym equipment so later I looked up sprint workouts online. I'll try a sprint routine early tomorrow.
There's a decent chance I'll get a sabbatical in the spring of 2013, by the way. Doesn't that sound forever away? I'd like to visit every county in Wisconsin, speak with a teacher or administrator about teaching, teacher training, etc., and write a book about it. The U will pay me to drive around the state and talk with educators. Sweet deal. The book's been on my mind. Some structural ideas are emerging. I think I could write a good one, combination travelogue, interview, academic, etc. book. Wish me luck.
Ok, I shouldn't eat anymore. What should I do? Read? Probably. Last night I finished Tomato Red but I'm not in the mood for a review yet. Maybe I'm spending too much time with words. More tomorrow. Good night.
Today is lost and directionless but not bad and probably necessary. After days or weekends like these I tend to manifest productivity. Isn't that why weekends exist? This morning, after restless sleep, I woke near 7, drank coffee, and took a shower. At nine I dragged everyone to the library. We parked on the street by the kids' section. T and I stayed upstairs while M, N, and S searched through the downstairs stacks. I found a couple baseball books, one on fastball pitchers and the other on statistics. The cable guy predicted a 10-12 window for phone repair, so N and I dropped off his mother and the two older boys before heading to Alterra's for a bagel, latte, and orange juice. The space was crowded but we snagged the table close near the counter and read for a solid half hour. I love those stretches. N will, hopefully, remember them.
The air was warm, well, warmer, around 50, and the water in the ground after a week's rain evaporated so I felt as if I were in a cooler and more comfortable version of Florida. I ate lunch, watched (with N) a documentary on the open oceans, and read the first forty pages of the fishing book. I'm restless. T needs a ride from Saukville in thirty minutes. Maybe I'll get him. The King's Speech sits in my backpack but I don't know that I'm in the mood. Tomorrow's Easter. I wouldn't mind hitting mass. Oh, I forgot to mention I worked out earlier, too, but I'm getting bored with the gym equipment so later I looked up sprint workouts online. I'll try a sprint routine early tomorrow.
There's a decent chance I'll get a sabbatical in the spring of 2013, by the way. Doesn't that sound forever away? I'd like to visit every county in Wisconsin, speak with a teacher or administrator about teaching, teacher training, etc., and write a book about it. The U will pay me to drive around the state and talk with educators. Sweet deal. The book's been on my mind. Some structural ideas are emerging. I think I could write a good one, combination travelogue, interview, academic, etc. book. Wish me luck.
Ok, I shouldn't eat anymore. What should I do? Read? Probably. Last night I finished Tomato Red but I'm not in the mood for a review yet. Maybe I'm spending too much time with words. More tomorrow. Good night.
Friday, April 22, 2011
Happy Good Friday. I feel as if I should attend services. The weather is excellent for churchgoing, all rain and wind, and I'd like to sit in the balcony off to the side and take in the readings and Gospel but not the hymns or the handshake of peace. My whole body feels tired, every muscle, but in a good way, matching the weather.
The last couple days have been pretty good. Ok, I'm going to stop grinding my teeth now. Breathe. Yes. This morning I rose at 4:10AM and hit the gym by five. Hardly anyone showed, probably people slept late for the holiday. I did forty-five minutes on the modified stairmaster and skipped crunches. I'll do those later. Then I showered, ate breakfast, and drove into the office. The two doors back by the maintenance parking lot were locked so I cut through the dorms again, where I flash my faculty ID and the desk clerk, who probably doesn't care who she's letting through into the lecture halls as long as that person doesn't stop by the elevators, waved me without as much as a glance up. I got a shitload finished, though, tedious and detail-oriented paperwork that requires or at least lends itself to isolation. Huge raindrops hung on the windows. I lit a candle and listened to eels. Paul the security guard stopped by for a chat but he didn't stay long as he was leaving at 7:30AM. Other than wrestling with the complicated new printer/copy machine the morning went well. After a quick consultation with M I drove south a couple miles to Trader Joe's. M likes their orzo so I snagged three bags, plus this new rice/orzo combination, along with tofu, marinara sauce, refried beans, and garbanzo beans. Tourists and family heading home for Easter, I imagine, were heavy on 43 north. I pushed past the highway amateurs. Later I watched the start of the last Harry Potter movie, but that storyline freaks the shit out of me, even though my ten and eight years old watched without a flinch. T was playing hoops in the rain so he and I played one on one while the wind brushed the mist sideways. That was fun, an enduring memory, even, and he's getting faster. He said “you're taller than me” and I said, “Not for long.” Then we drove over to Starbucks for free Earth Day coffee and Gamestop for Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2. T's been weird this week. First, he's on a self-imposed “no facebook” stretch that started after an insomniac night. Then he's hardly asked to hang out with friends. I'm not sure what's up, but he says everything's fine. We'll see. He's a great kid.
I'm drinking free coffee, reading Tomato Red, and probably will drink more coffee soon because I want to stay up tonight for The King's Speech. How in the hell did 5PM arrive? Have a good Friday.
The last couple days have been pretty good. Ok, I'm going to stop grinding my teeth now. Breathe. Yes. This morning I rose at 4:10AM and hit the gym by five. Hardly anyone showed, probably people slept late for the holiday. I did forty-five minutes on the modified stairmaster and skipped crunches. I'll do those later. Then I showered, ate breakfast, and drove into the office. The two doors back by the maintenance parking lot were locked so I cut through the dorms again, where I flash my faculty ID and the desk clerk, who probably doesn't care who she's letting through into the lecture halls as long as that person doesn't stop by the elevators, waved me without as much as a glance up. I got a shitload finished, though, tedious and detail-oriented paperwork that requires or at least lends itself to isolation. Huge raindrops hung on the windows. I lit a candle and listened to eels. Paul the security guard stopped by for a chat but he didn't stay long as he was leaving at 7:30AM. Other than wrestling with the complicated new printer/copy machine the morning went well. After a quick consultation with M I drove south a couple miles to Trader Joe's. M likes their orzo so I snagged three bags, plus this new rice/orzo combination, along with tofu, marinara sauce, refried beans, and garbanzo beans. Tourists and family heading home for Easter, I imagine, were heavy on 43 north. I pushed past the highway amateurs. Later I watched the start of the last Harry Potter movie, but that storyline freaks the shit out of me, even though my ten and eight years old watched without a flinch. T was playing hoops in the rain so he and I played one on one while the wind brushed the mist sideways. That was fun, an enduring memory, even, and he's getting faster. He said “you're taller than me” and I said, “Not for long.” Then we drove over to Starbucks for free Earth Day coffee and Gamestop for Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2. T's been weird this week. First, he's on a self-imposed “no facebook” stretch that started after an insomniac night. Then he's hardly asked to hang out with friends. I'm not sure what's up, but he says everything's fine. We'll see. He's a great kid.
I'm drinking free coffee, reading Tomato Red, and probably will drink more coffee soon because I want to stay up tonight for The King's Speech. How in the hell did 5PM arrive? Have a good Friday.
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Why hello, faithful blog readers. I'm upstairs, in the green camping chair, under the full spectrum light. N pulled this chair upstairs a few weeks back and I salute his innovative tendencies because this camp chair fits the space well. I've been reading here, rather than in bed or on the floor, more often than not.
This week has been ok. I'm struggling with exhaustion/illness more than I'd like, three weeks after the wisdom teeth removal, and I can't seem to shake the recovery process. Not sure why. Yesterday I taught and by the end of the day my voice was gone and staff members were trying to send me home so I didn't die on the premises. Today, after twelve hours of sleep, I felt better. The boys and I hit Cabela's for a new net and Costco for mozzarella sticks although apparently Costco doesn't stock mozzarella sticks anymore so we settled for Nilla wafers. This afternoon I walked maybe five miles through the grey, forboding Wisconsin spring. Geese looked angry. And while the five miles wore me out more than they should I felt happy with the exertion. I tried to breathe and reframe the afternoon in a more positive light, and I 75% succeeded.
Tonight I think I'm starting Woodrell's Tomato Red. After 100+ pages from Bryson's book on houses I got bored with his meandering and I'm ready for something else.
Ok, I want to talk about suicide for a second. Don't be alarmed. I'm not going to off myself, not with the high quality drugs I can legally access, especially since I read the hydroxine label and discovered I can take two a night. Holy hell, I love that substance. When combined with Lunesta the trio of pills provide about a half hour of pharmaceutical bliss before I fall asleep. I want to take some right now but the hour is barely past six. That's ok. A couple hours. Anyway, back to suicide. Historically I've perceived suicide as a release valve, if you will, a way out if my existence became too painful or out of my personal control. And I doubt that'll ever change. But now, as I get older, I warily eye those who choose to end their lives with great empathy and a quiet understanding, like sighing air from my lungs and reaching across a table to someone I want to comfort. This has been on my mind, I think, because two people have killed themselves in downtown Port this winter. The first, a woman, leaped off the breakwater during a winter storm. The second shot himself on a bluff bench. I am not on that path. But I recognize the dead as speaking a language that I comprehend and never can unlearn. May their souls rest tonight.
T is watching Takers. He's in middle school, yes, with the worst movie tastes imaginable. I refuse to watch. Tomorrow the boys and I might hit the Imax for a film about the Hubble telescope. N is obsessed with space. Or we'll save the gas money and stay local. Not sure. I'm already bored with Easter break. Bring on the season's rebirth. Have a good Wednesday night.
This week has been ok. I'm struggling with exhaustion/illness more than I'd like, three weeks after the wisdom teeth removal, and I can't seem to shake the recovery process. Not sure why. Yesterday I taught and by the end of the day my voice was gone and staff members were trying to send me home so I didn't die on the premises. Today, after twelve hours of sleep, I felt better. The boys and I hit Cabela's for a new net and Costco for mozzarella sticks although apparently Costco doesn't stock mozzarella sticks anymore so we settled for Nilla wafers. This afternoon I walked maybe five miles through the grey, forboding Wisconsin spring. Geese looked angry. And while the five miles wore me out more than they should I felt happy with the exertion. I tried to breathe and reframe the afternoon in a more positive light, and I 75% succeeded.
Tonight I think I'm starting Woodrell's Tomato Red. After 100+ pages from Bryson's book on houses I got bored with his meandering and I'm ready for something else.
Ok, I want to talk about suicide for a second. Don't be alarmed. I'm not going to off myself, not with the high quality drugs I can legally access, especially since I read the hydroxine label and discovered I can take two a night. Holy hell, I love that substance. When combined with Lunesta the trio of pills provide about a half hour of pharmaceutical bliss before I fall asleep. I want to take some right now but the hour is barely past six. That's ok. A couple hours. Anyway, back to suicide. Historically I've perceived suicide as a release valve, if you will, a way out if my existence became too painful or out of my personal control. And I doubt that'll ever change. But now, as I get older, I warily eye those who choose to end their lives with great empathy and a quiet understanding, like sighing air from my lungs and reaching across a table to someone I want to comfort. This has been on my mind, I think, because two people have killed themselves in downtown Port this winter. The first, a woman, leaped off the breakwater during a winter storm. The second shot himself on a bluff bench. I am not on that path. But I recognize the dead as speaking a language that I comprehend and never can unlearn. May their souls rest tonight.
T is watching Takers. He's in middle school, yes, with the worst movie tastes imaginable. I refuse to watch. Tomorrow the boys and I might hit the Imax for a film about the Hubble telescope. N is obsessed with space. Or we'll save the gas money and stay local. Not sure. I'm already bored with Easter break. Bring on the season's rebirth. Have a good Wednesday night.
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